developmental biology for beginners, or Mother Nature is Amoral

If by some bizarre set of circumstances Asshat McGee in Georgia manages to shove through his "miscarriage punishable by death" legislation, the logical next step is actually the prohibition of any non-barrier form of contraception up to and including the rhythm method.

See, he wants to define personhood as beginning the moment a sperm bites into an egg. Wham, two cells combine, it's Joe. Unfortunately, the fact that cells have combined in no way guarantees a live birth, or even that the active zygote won't be passed in the woman's next menstruation. Indeed, it is a matter of general consensus among reproductive healthcare providers that after day 13 of the menstrual cycle one or more eggs is released into the uterus and will survive about 24 hours. If the egg is not fertilized in this time it is flushed out of the body about two weeks later. If the egg is fertilized in this time but for whatever reason doesn't adhere to the blood-rich uterine lining it too is flushed out of the body about two weeks later. Joe, meet tampon.

Women's bodies do this on their own all the time, as is doubtless being discussed throughout the internet at this moment. Billions of uteri over the years have rejected or simply failed to accept viable zygotes because the zygote simply never made it over there, for no particular reason. This is not a tragedy, this is not a miscarriage, this is not a baby, this is not a person. It is a microscopic cluster of cells that oozed out of a woman along with a whole bunch of blood and mucus.

Inter-uterine devices (IUDs (or Coils, in the UK)) work (we think) by inhibiting a zygote's ability to attach to the lining of the uterus. If you look at it like a Fundie, that would mean that an IUD works by starving the poor helplessly-flailing fertilized cell to death. Progesterone-infused IUDS are even worse--they don't usually inhibit egg release, but they do prevent the body from building up a uterine lining And physically inhibit zygote implantation. Oh, what a hostile environment!

Hormonal birth control methods generally do inhibit ovum release, so I guess they should be Fundie-fine, but they're absolutely horrible in every other way. They screw around with women's physiology so much that they cause neurological disorders, emotional disturbances, weight problems, digestive problems, dermatological problems, fibroid problems, bleeding disorders, and a host of other unpleasant changes. Barrier methods likewise prevent fertilization...when they work, but they're notoriously movable, breakable, by-passable, and faulty. The most reliable, least-unpleasant form of contraception is in fact the IUD, which, to the Fundie, could be considered forced miscarriage, i.e. muuuuurrrrder.

Obviously, non-implantation happens on its own constantly--the Mayo clinic has stated that non-implantation and even implanted miscarriage within the first 3 weeks of pregnancy occurs all the damn time, far more than the 1/4 of detected pregnancies that end in spontaneous miscarriage. Evidence exists to suggest the likelihood of Most pregnancies failing at this time, but it is utterly impossible to tell how many unacknowledged fertilized ova have been absorbed by sanitary products, even in women who were hoping to not have a period this month.

All IUDs do is bump up this number a bit, but if you believe, as many morons do, that personhood begins at fertilization, they could be seen as aiding and abetting the natural inhospitable nature of the uterus toward God's chosen innocent helpless blastocysts. It would follow, then, that the miscarriage police would feel comfortable in banning implantation-inhibitors, and should enforce that all sexually active women take human chorionic gonadotrophin supplements to prevent evil progesterone cycles triggering the uterine lining to shed before implantation occurs. If personhood begins at fertilization, we must do everything in our power to ensure that zygotes survive, including suppressing normal biology and causing heinous damage to women's bodies and minds in the process.

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The trouble is, religion and law don't really fit with the truth of how bodies and societies actually work. They exist in this idealized, inhuman sphere that cannot cope with the truth that the body is amoral. It does its own thing no matter what you tell it. Whenever life begins is irrelevant to the uterus. The menstrual cycle is only a pattern of chemical releases, one that pregnancy may or may not interrupt. So too is a woman's decision-making process entirely comprised of electrochemical impulses. Whether the uterus or the brain decides to not see a pregnancy through, it is all part of the functionality of the female. If a fertilization results in a non-viable foetus, if a woman is on drugs, what have you--the inside of a woman must be off-limits to the prying, judging, moralizing, arbitrary eyes of the law and the church.

In conclusion: It may be Joe, but that really doesn't matter.